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Posted by The Gimcracker in Fail on 02. Mar, 2010 | No Comments
There are two levels of Fail. If a fail places in the “miniscule to minor” range, the reaction is always laughter. If the fail falls anywhere above that range, the reaction is always “Oohh!!” – regardless of language spoken. This video proves it. For example, watch the three clips in a row starting at 47 seconds in. The reactions are always “Oohh!!” because the person might be hurt. The very next clip (55 seconds) where the dude falls off the rock in the water merits laughter because he’s obviously not hurt. The only exception to this rule is if a woman is filming the fail, in which case the reaction is a scream.
Posted by The Gimcracker in Gimcrackery, Men Vs. Women on 02. Mar, 2010 | 4 Comments
If some dude was transplanted from 50 years ago to a conversation happening today between two people about a third person, that dude would most likely get the wrong impression about the person being discussed. That’s because words can have different meanings because of variables like A) what time period the word is used, B) the vocal inflection or body language accompanying the words, and C) who the person in question is. For instance, the word “dude” used to probably mean something more specific than it does now. We call everyone a dude, but back then I think it had something to do with a dude ranch or something. I’m not going to look it up, but you get the idea.
Well, today I want to focus in on one of the variables I mentioned, and that is who the person in question is, or more specifically, what gender the person is. This type of thing is discussed ad nauseum in stand-up comic routines about the differences in men and women. So, I decided to make it unique by expressing my ideas not in front of a live studio audience, but via my blog. That makes it different right? No? Well how about this: mine will be way funnier and more true. Actually I probably can’t pull that off. That leaves me only one optoin: embed a Youtube video at the end of the post. Beat that, Jim Gaffagan!
Here is a list of adjectives used to describe people, followed by what that adjective really means. Notice how they unfortunately differ based on whether or not you are talking about a man or a woman:
Posted by The Gimcracker in Gaming, Twitter Sucks on 17. Feb, 2010 | 4 Comments
This video presents a conundrum to me. It attacks the video game industry, which obviously offends me. But it also attacks the social media industry, which fills me with great exuberance. I’m left torn and conflicted, bouncing back and forth between emotions, trying to figure out what my overall reaction is. This does not happen to me. The Gimcracker exists to bust you upside your head with knowledge. It is always my goal to f*** you up with some truth. If you can name what show I just quoted I will friend request you on Facebook and follow you on Twitter immediately. Sike. Watch this video and tell me your reaction. I’d love to hear what you think about it:
Posted by The Gimcracker in ROFL, Seriously?! on 12. Jan, 2010 | No Comments
This is a thing. A real thing. It’s a medication to treat acid reflux disease. What did they call it? AciPhex, naturally. Wait a second… AciPhex? Assiphex? Ass effects? No, no that can’t be right. Well yes, actually, that’s exactly how it’s pronounced. ASS EFFECTS. See for yourself – watch the commercial and try to keep a straight face:
Posted by The Gimcracker in Beratings, Movies on 30. Dec, 2009 | 3 Comments
Have you ever been so immersed in a story or character that you forget it is not real? Avatar does that to you. After seeing the film, it’s hard to remember that the blue-skinned alien race called the Na’vi doesn’t actually exist. It’s hard to imagine that Biff from Back To The Future isn’t a jerk in real life. Or that Middle Earth isn’t a real place. It’s because of good film-making that those things are so convincing. If I could sum up Avatar in a single phrase, it wouldn’t be “master storytelling”, “heart-wrenching drama”, “superb characters”, or even “ground-breaking”, it would simply be “superb film-making”. James Cameron knows how to make a film into an event that you can’t miss. Audiences were greatly affected by movies like The Terminator, Aliens, and Titanic. Well we can definitely add Avatar to the ever-growing list of must-sees in the theater.
Posted by The Gimcracker in Twitter Sucks on 16. Dec, 2009 | No Comments
There are a lot of reasons to delete your Facebook account, and I’ve been over a lot of them. But this is the final straw. Get out while you can! Facebook just made all of your stuff public. That’s right, your friends lists, profile pics, fan pages, and network memberships are all public now. I’m so glad I deleted my account permanently (which was rocket science to do, by the way). You should too! If not because it’s a huge waste of time, makes your relationships with some people awkward, and glorifies extroverts and annoying ego-centric people, do it because they are violating your freedom!
Posted by The Gimcracker in Gimcrackery on 24. Nov, 2009 | 3 Comments
I have to work the Friday after Thanksgiving. I used to think this was a bad thing, and it seems like everyone else has that day off. But this year, after looking through the morbidly obese Sunday paper and seeing all of the “Black Friday” deals, I decided it was actually a good thing, since it meant I didn’t even have the option to shop that day. Black Friday makes me sick. The problem is, like most evil things, it is so appealing in some ways. For instance, I saw that BluRays are going to be like $6. I saw the Cannon T1i (a $900 camera) is going for $699. I saw an xbox 360 for $299… WITH SIX GAMES. So there is definitely that element of intrigue there. But it’s evil, right? Yes. Maybe these low-down, dirty examples of Black Friday ads will disgust you enough to hammer that idea home.
Posted by The Gimcracker in LOLheads, Sports on 23. Nov, 2009 | No Comments
It’s been quite a while since we had a Bill Belichick sighting, probably because during the off season he retreats to his mansion in Croatia and watches Lacrosse while listening to Bon Jovi albums. He was a little busier than usual this off-season bailing his son out of trouble for under-age drinking and pot possession. He was almost kicked off the Lacrosse team! But all that is behind him because the NFL season is fully underway and he’s back in the spotlight. Belichick’s rise to fame, proceeded by it’s rapid decline due to unsportsmanlike conduct and cheating, followed by it’s sharp drop-off after a retarded coaching decision against the Colts last week, bears resemblance to the front man of a particular 2000’s-era Canadian rock band. In fact, they have a lot of things in common, particularly the fact that they are both insanely successful despite being universally hated by most of the fans in their industry. I think you will know who I’m talking about when you see this recent Belichick sighting from yesterday afternoon:
Posted by The Gimcracker in Seriously?!, Television, Theory & Philosophy on 20. Nov, 2009 | 2 Comments
I know what you’re thinking: two Seriously?! posts about television networks, back to back? The economy is in bad shape, man, and it affects everyone. Or I watched a little too much TV this week. So, did you happen to catch any of the programming on NBC last night, namely The Office and 30 Rock? If you did, you may now loose the wire around your neck – it’s not worth killing yourself. If you didn’t, I just want you to know that this blog post is not exaggerated – these things actually occurred on this planet in this dimension in this country in my living room.
Apparently it is “Green Week” or something (didn’t know that) and NBC is the most liberally-biased network there is (did know that), which is a very annoying combination. Before I tell you what happened, let me refresh you with our classic TGM political disclaimers. I am neither conservative nor liberal on all matters, and I do not fall into either of the groups in the two one-party system. If NBC was ultra-conservative instead of liberal, and it was like “Gun Week” or something, then I would be equally annoyed. Glad we cleared that up. So, what hoopla went on last night, besides a pot-head scoring 3 TDs against Carolina?
Posted by The Gimcracker in Seriously?!, Sports on 16. Nov, 2009 | 2 Comments
I just need to vent for a second about the coverage that I have seen in the media regarding the 11/16/09 Sunday night Colts vs. Patriots game, and this is just in the 12 hours after the game. I’m not going to waste a lot of your time, and I wasn’t going to do a post about the game because it sort of speaks for itself. But by golly someone needs to stand up and defend the Colts against this biased, band-wagon jumping, star-struck, Tom Brady-loving nation.
